Week 3 Story: Venus' Vanity
 |
| Venus' Vanity |
Her head graced with golden locks, sparkling from the ocean's salty mist. The goddess of love's skin lacked any imperfections and retained the most dashing pink hue. Driven by her confidence she wed Vulcan, the god of fire and metalwork, but pledged her love to Mars the Roman god of war.
Assuming her beauty allowed her countless admirers, Venus spent her days being waited on by the most rugged of soldiers, each under Mars' command.
Being that her beauty was unmatched, Venus grew in her confidence. She knew that attracting men from all over was the greatest power of them all, as it allowed thousands of men to be at her disposal.
Unaware of her husband and lovers watchful eye as she grew in her ability to control the most powerful of men, she began to question just how much she can get away with.
One uneventful day, Venus decides to test just how much she could get away with and begins to rule the thousands of men at her feet. So, she began sending them on self-promoting missions promising them a kiss with the goddess herself in return for their allegiance.
Vulcan and Mars grew tired of their lover's vain demeanor and found great embarrassment in the men's actions, especially Mars.
Knowing that there was little to be done about Venus' beauty, they hatched a plan to bring the goddess back down from her hot-headed escapades. Both men knew exactly how to regain control of Venus' men, and it all started with a rumor.
Mars sent for Murcery, the messenger of the gods. Once arrived, Mars ordered Murcery to travel far and wide to warn those against Venus for if they bend to her command they will turn to flies meant to live out their stays swarming a donkey's ass.
Needless to say, the flowing river of men that lead to Venus began to dry out. The goddess began to question her own beauty, wondering if she had lost her appeal. Both Mars and Murcery appeared before Venus to enjoy the silence their work had permitted.
As she laid concerned for her future, the truth dawned on Venus. Her true appeal was her unmatched beauty that was meant to inspire the pollution of the earth rather than enslave it. She realized that her god-like beauty should be untouchable, meant to separate herself from mortal grace. She again then found great confidence in herself and pledged to never blur the line between mortal and godlike beauty because they both harbor much different power.
̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲̲
Authors note:
I based my story on the story of Cupid and Psyche, but chose to focus mostly on Venus. Her insecurity throughout the whole story of Cupid and Psyche inspired me to discuss humility within my story. I chose "Venus' Vanity" as the title because I think being vain, even when fully permitted (i.e. being for sure the most beautiful there ever was) immediately makes you unattractive. In addition to being vain, lacking confidence is equally as unattractive. It is hard to be comfortable within your skin, but remembering self-worth, regardless of who you are, is important because we are all humans trying to enjoy the short, short ride we call life. No matter who you are, never consume yourself with yourself, but rather those around you. Finally, this story follows the ever so classic, "True beauty is found within".
Hey Brooke!
ReplyDeleteYour story seemed to remind me of the Ovid's Metamorphoses story of Narcissus who fell in love with himself through outer beauty and it ultimately destroyed him. I like that you decided to focus on Venus and give some sort of background to her behavior in the take of Cupid and Psyche. I think that it would have been a better telling if you had more story flow with details and specifics opposed to spreading everything out in multiple mini paragraphs. Maybe you could have elaborated on why Mars and Vulcan decided to join focuses to stop Venus from being so vain. In the tales, Mars is the other man coming in and violating their marriage which Vulcan isn't happy about. Wouldn't it make more sense for them to stay enemies unless provided with more reason to join up? Also when the men started to stop visiting Venus, was it because they committed and became flies or were they too scared to become flies and stayed back? It was a nice story but I'm left with so many questions :c I'm sure in your next telling though you'll do great and I look forward to it!
Hi again Brooke, nice story! I actually laughed out loud at the rumor you thought of. I like how you changed the story of the two men working together, it reminded me of another story where aphrodite and hera work together to bring down zeus for his infidelities (also with a rumor of sorts). The ending is a great come around, because as the story progressed I started to dislike her as a person but you created a good redemption for her at the end.
ReplyDeleteHey Brooke. I loved the story, it is very creative. I enjoy how it kinda has that middle school drama feel to it but with the professional writing style. I could see this happen and connect with this way of writing way better than the original. I also liked how there was a story that made me doubt my feelings on Venus herself as a character. I believe that there is something to be said about that in your writing. I am looking forward to reading more!
ReplyDeleteHey Brooke! I really enjoyed your story. It was very concise and it got its point across easily. I really like that the story had a happy ending for everyone. It gave a good lesson. I wonder why Venus chose to wed Vulcan, when she had her love for Mars. Was it a type of power move? Was it because she just wanted to be able to have two male gods at her whim? Possibly both? I also wonder what happened after this story. Venus chose not to meddle with mortal men, but was she still involved with Vulcan or Mars? Did she have to choose between them? What if she knew of the plot that Vulcan and Mars thought of. She would probably not question her beauty, but she also wouldn't have her army anymore. So I wonder what she would've done instead. Overall, I really enjoyed your rendition of the story!
ReplyDeleteHello Brooke! I thought your story was really great! I thought the story flowed very well making it very easy to follow. I really liked the rumor of the men turning into flies that would swarm a donkey's ass, I thought it was very creative and funny! Overall the story was great and I can't wait to read more, keep it up!
ReplyDeleteI liked your story. I like the story for it showed many traits such as greed, beauty, and humility. i loved how you stuck with the original idea of the gods to tell the story, because for all my stories I try to give them a modern touch. I feel this makes people connect with your story and the original story. did you consider instead of making the story end with her learning a lesson from the trick that the men played on her, maybe making it to where the men become overly jealous and decide to make her realize what she has done on her own by leaving her, while still knowing she is beautiful. This would change the type of humility that she would learn without her having to think the mortal find her less beautiful because she is the goddess of beauty. It was such a good story it hard to tell you to change it or fix it. So great job.
ReplyDelete